Army Group 2 - Withy or Won't he?

Not raining for an Army match that cant be right but I'll take it.  Don't feel great bit like the last Army match where I had to leave the bank early due to ill health.  Still I think I should make it to the finish line today. Whilst the fields of Barley at the end of my garden may not be "Fields of Gold" as Sting would say but they were certainly shimmering with the silvery morning dew.

I get underway Meatloaf is on the IPOD singing "Paradise by the Dashboard Light" and it makes me laugh out loud.  Happy memories of listening to the track on a cassette player in the car of my then girlfriend.  A mark one Silver Ford Capri.  Back seat, not the most ergonomic place to have sex, but any port in a storm for an enthusiastic teenager.  It was warm and dry the car that is, not the girl.  The sticking point was she required I wore a french letter, or a condom as they now known.

I hated condoms, 20 p in the chewing gum machine in the pub gents toilets and then struggle like bloody hell to open the seal fresh packet without damaging the contents.  They were never normal, pot luck for colour, flavour and style.  In this case I had a pink french tickler , little nobbles of rubber all over it, it looked like some sort of sea anemone.

The next problem (by the way I am grateful to Billy Connolly on this) as many years later he did a sketch. I swear he must have been in my head.  To quote my brain and Billy's sketch, "at which point in the proceedings, do you put the damn thing on?  I mean do you you arrive with it on or what? Well just as the song was playing the girl/ boy conversation was "do you love me (boy replies) let me sleep on it" My girl wanted commitment or condom.  So condom it was, and a rush to seize the moment without damaging the impossibly thin rubber.

So tune in next week to see what happened. Just kidding mind your own business.

So to the match, will my friend and fishing mentor Yoda (JD) continue his dominance of recent matches with yet another win. Added to the fact he is a venue expert at Witherington Farm its a case of Withy or wont he  win today.

Breakfast first dished up by the terrific Rachel and Glenn and then the draw. I was true to my team name today as I was an Orphan, no others had turned out. I presume Dave C is still ill, and Carl etc are working. I drew peg C1 or permanent peg 28. So no team mates , a bad draw, oh and to top it I was on the boards. Just a kick in the balls and my day will be complete.

Never mind lets enjoy the day. Already regretting going a quid against John but you never know.  The match starts and I take the chop worm and caster approach across, and feed 6 mill expander down the track.  The match is slow the Carp are cruising under the surface and basking in the sun.  All I can get are Rudd but they are reasonable size and quality and how can you not appreciate the beauty of such lovely fish.

The far side dries up, well it was never really wet. So I try the track with pellet and although the baited area is fizzing, I try a variety of baits with no action . Even maggot is not cutting it.  I decide to get of the tackle box and root around for a tin of corn; and at last I start getting a few bites, with skimmers and hybrids coming.  Still I have good company the brilliant Dave "Docs" Docherty and hes catching a few so it gives me something to watch at least.

Marty Bray is next to him relaxing in a deck chair to ease a painful back and fishing the method, with not much joy.  The pegs to my left are in the next section but they are very quite nobody is catching and its very quite.

I wonder how my Pewsey mate Bri Shutler is doing, hes on a good run at the moment and has drawn the flier on the venue peg 55 first of the Car park. News is hes catching but losing a lot as well.

The match moves on , I wont say drags, as it is nice to be there and not working. Very pleasant. Kev East the group secretary has once again organised a very good day. Top angler top bloke, and the house wife's favourite I believe.

Eventually I managed a four small Carp under 2 pound nice little stockies but all in all I couldn't do much more from this very quite stretch of the venue. So to the weigh in Docs is on the scales me on the boards. We start at the far end and Dave Hydes who is on an end peg with nothing between him and the Carp park, permanent peg 10.  Hes smashed us all. with a huge 33 kilo + Graham Dixon pushes Ivan into third by 30 grams.; and there is only 30 grams between myself and Chris Perry so we have mid section blues. Docs is surprised about how many Carp he has and how big they are so he pips that other good angler Mike Poolman.

B section has been won as expected by Bri Shutler. With almost double his nearest rival Rocky

The section of death A section is on the inner snake and I am surprised the bridge across to the middle has stood the weight of the egos that crossed it to fish today but it did. Eventually Ian Ross a guest of JD on the day comes out on top with the house wife's favourite second and Mick Craddock 3rd.

A lovely day with good friends draws to a close and I hand over my pound coin to Yoda who doubled my weight on the day.  I am not giving him the bird in the photo, it was to someone behind the camera who was taking the P.

Finally the top three , Brian wins (again) JDs run comes to an end. Davey Hydes is second and Ian Ross third.  Brian is getting fed up of my camera.  Brian if your reading this I am getting fed up of photographing you !!!!! See you next time.